Last year, many women upgraded their BoyFriend 3.1 to BoyFriendPLUS 1.0 (marketing name: Fiance 1.0) and then further upgraded Fiance 1.0 to Husband 1.0. They found that 1.0 is a memory hogger and incompatible to many other programs in their lives. Husband 1.0 includes plug-ins such as MotherInLaw, BrotherInLaw, and AnnoyingLoserFriends although market research has clearly shown that they are unnecessary and unwanted.

The upcoming Boyfriend 4.0 will change all that. Created by leading experts in the field and based upon years of research and classroom lectures, it includes the best of the old features, such as the HandyMan function, and includes many new functions such as the optional Commitment feature. Other functions, such as NightOut and WillCall have been removed, though they can still be found on FRATBOY 1.1

Boyfriend 4.0 will include:

• Automatic reminder button and pay attention feature
• Minimize button
• Shutdown feature
• Shopping function
• Back-up energy supply
• Laundry, Cooking, & Housecleaning function
• Diaper-changing function, for the more advanced users
• Self-destruct sequence
  once it's uninstalled it won't come back

  Monogamy feature

  Automatic override

  kicks in right before they're about to say anything even remotely stupid